I can conquer the world with one hand as long as you keep holding the other

I once had talked to a guy who wouldn’t show affection to his wife in public. Why? He wanted to be a good role model for young boys.

Did he really just say that holding hands with his wife in front of people was being a bad role model? His reasoning made me sad. Really it did. It also left me speechless. I only saw them hold hands once. That was it~~ and they were newlyweds!

I believe that the small act of holding hands in public can be a big witness. Holding hands with your wife shouldn’t be looked down upon at any place, nor do in prayer halls neither at work place and not at all in public market places. I am thankful that there are couples who serve together in ministry as well as contribute their best in business together. I think it is great to show youth strong thriving marriages, especially since there are a lot of marriages that seem to be in crisis.

I disagree with this man’s reason for not showing affection with his wife in public. I think a great way for a husband to be a role model is to show affection to his wife in public. How is it bad to hold hands of your wife in public? I don’t feel it is. 

There are so many other things which a man can teach to many other young men around. Like, they must not slander others or be heavy drinkers. They should teach others what is good. These older men/women must train the younger men/women to love their wives/husbands and their children, to live wisely and be pure, to work in their homes, to do well, and to be submissive to each other. Then they will not bring shame on the word of God.

I believe that women do have responsibilities and I do take that seriously. I believe that how wives treat their husbands is important, and can be a witness. Wives, we can witness not just to girls, but to everyone. I honestly believe that having a healthy marriage based on scriptural principles can be an incredible witness to the world! 

Holding hands should be, in my humble opinion, an outward sign of a happy and healthy marriage.

If holding hands with your husband/wife in public is hard for you, I hope the following will encourage you. If you feel that it is awkward, maybe you can take some small steps towards this. Start by holding hands in the movie theater or under the table at a restaurant. Then start holding hands when you go on walks together. Hopefully it can become second nature for you and your husband to hold hands in a crowd. It is really a blessed feeling. Each one of you should appreciate that each of you want to show the world unashamedly that you both are proud to be with each other and at the same time letting each one of you know how much you love each other.

I read it recently that Floyd, 90, and Violet Hartwig, 89, married for nearly seven decades have died at their home five hours apart while holding hands. They both were childhood sweethearts who remained inseparable right up until the last moments that they spent together. Little did they know that years later they would live a life defined by an unwavering love for and dedication to one another, and ultimately, by a deep, handheld connection.

Be blessed and take pride in showing it to the world around that you are in love with a right person!

When life seems difficult and everything seems to go wrong

Life is not always a walk on roses, nor it is full of chocolates and mangoes on your plate, but still you have to move on and live on. Sometime things happen your way and many other times you do not like the way God has planned things to transpire. Sometimes you refuse to accept what God has in store for you by ignoring the opportunity which has come your way and at many occasions you just keep waiting for the good things to come your way.

I am stuck in same situation since few days now. I do not see things happening my way. I am left shattered many times when what I expected refused to materialize. And with this came the disappointment, frustration, grief and negative attitude towards everything around.

You always want a logical, real and practical reason behind everything that happens for good or not so good. You just cannot accept things without looking into the every single and minute detail of it. And, exactly when you are gloomy, all looks so negative and dark because of your up-side-down attitude/approach towards life & wrong timings of things being fashionable around you.

All I could bring out in the process is that even when your schedule does not matches with the schedule God has set for things to ensue; one should not stop putting in efforts. Just avoiding all those things which are the reasons for delay and are very much under your control to be practiced will never ever reduces your anxiety. The moment you stop doing anything which you needed or could have done, the delay will be indefinite and you will be declared as a looser because of your own self and not because of anyone else. But all those things which cannot be controlled should be let go. For example; you cannot stop people from being verbose, interfering and self-seeking rather all you can do is to maintain a safe distance and keep moving in your life.

All I have learnt in the process is that we should keep putting in our efforts without waiting or thinking about the results; because God blesses only those who keep trying for the results. Identify the problems; work on those whole heartedly and then only you should leave the results and timings on him. But without your cent percent efforts even God will not help you.

All said and done, important is that Faith should always be there. It needs to prevail in everything to come.

hasta la vista

You may be given retirement because you are growing old. But it is a pity that they doesn’t realize, that it is letting go of an asset more precious than gold. And although you seem to be too young to retire, but since the day has come, I applaud you for your years of service and achievement at NITI Aayog (formerly Planning Commission). Please accept my heartiest congratulations and best wishes for your retirement.

Although it has been just a year and few months that I have started working with you, still I will need to adjust to the idea that you are no longer in the room number 401. I have thoroughly enjoyed our association. How I wish that you were born a few years later so that we would have got some more time to work under the guidance of an awesome boss like you. I have already started feeling that as if a part of us is missing. You have always brightened up the whole office. I hope I can do your reputation justice!

I can see very few who have worked as hard as you have. You never took day – offs from work... and there are no day – offs in retirement either. I hope you will enjoy directing your energies into your other special interests.

Please remember that no matter how much everyone wishes you well for your retirement, deep down inside they’re just sad that you are leaving.

All I will say at last is “PLEASE DO NOT BE A STRANGER”. 

Either drive or know how to avoid the bumpy roads of life

I have recently read it somewhere written that “if you feel that you’re the only driver in a relationship; it’s time to park it and walk away.” And Karma says there is no need for revenge. Just sit back and wait. Those who hurt you will eventually screw-up themselves and if you are lucky, God will let you watch. And keeping both these facts in mind and practicing it, which I have started doing recently, all I have reached to is that I am a very patient person and I give plenty of second chances but at the same time I am not a saint also to believe you every second time. I have my own limits as well. All that I have to advice to anyone in a relationship, that if one wants to avoid the probable bumps to occur, he or she should follow three golden rules which are (1) Don’t lie, (2) Don’t cheat and (3) Don’t make promise you can’t keep.

I think the best way to make anyone understand anything is via your silence, because sometimes silence has the power more than the words. And that is why they say, “She used words to say nothing at all and silence to explain everything.”

All I have to conclude is that I am happy to know and to observe a transformed me as I have come to accept the bumpy roads of life. All it seems to lead, the best, transformed and refined you, is to the best ever places. And it is just on the journey you realize the value of true people, people who deserve to stay near to you, people who knows & appreciate your worth and people you can look up to for every small little thing in life.

As far as words go to heal like medicines do

Today I met someone for the very first time and I would say addressing him as a True Gentleman ("G") would be an understatement. He is a soul hard to find rather ceases to exist in today’s time. He lives less for himself and more for others who are known to him and for those who doesn’t but will surely know him in the days to come because the kind of influence he has cannot go unnoticed for long. Mine was the first meeting with him today but really I want to meet him again and again. I really want to hear what all he has to say and share. He uses the easiest language to answer the most complex questions regarding life. The reason of our meeting wasn’t a nice one but still the meeting was enough to teach me the toughest lessons of life in the simplest way ever.

One of our friends lost his dad and his demise left all the living relationships shattered behind. He got a loss for lifetime which can never be repaired and the vacuum created by the missing soul can never be filled back. We all know this fact already but still when we face it, the situation becomes hard to accept for everyone. And moreover, it also happens that people fall short of words when it comes to counsel someone going through this kind of bad phase in life.

But today, being an extraordinary day, I met someone who had the perfect words to say and most appropriate examples to quote to bring the feeling of being better off than many, even in the worst situations of your life. “G” quoted, the daughter to a martyrdom attained solider, who was born after three months of her father being passed away is worst off as she never got a chance to see her father, nor did she met him ever, neither she shared a single smile or word with him ever. And when she was just three years old, she said her father in her dreams said that they both do not have even a single photograph together. These words from a daughter who was not fortunate enough to meet her father ever, were enough to bring the never ending flow of tears in the eyes of many who heard this. And hence, the friend of ours who lost his father just two days back is much better off as he at least have the memories of togetherness with his dad which he can cherish throughout his life.

That way “G” could easily explain that it is wise to be happy for the moments you have spent with the lost soul, which you can cherish, rather than crying for the moments which will never come. I am really influenced (which is very rare of me) and truly looking forward for meeting “G” more often to get to know such inspiring incidences and hence feeling blessed for what all I have and for all the time I am living with my loved ones. 

Life and Mistakes

Experience is the name which everyone gives to their mistakes. People usually think that mistakes only show up what needs improvement. They think, without mistakes how would they know what they had to work on. It is a known fact that anyone who has never made a mistake has never tried anything new. People think and say that making mistake is the only thing to grow. According to a bunch of, so called, experienced people you have to fail in order to practice being brave. If you have made mistakes, there is always a chance for you. You may have a fresh start any moment you choose, for this thing we call ‘failure’ is not the falling down, but the staying down for a period of time you chooses to stay.

All said and done, the important thing to remember is to continue the process of learning along with making mistakes. The only bad mistake is the one from which we learn nothing. All men make mistakes but only wise men learn from their mistakes. Hence a person should make sure to learn; what and to whatever extent a mistake has to teach. Life is a bad teacher and unfortunately so as a mistake. Both of them teach lessons but only after the test are over or the time is gone.

Hence one should appreciate and live with what you have learnt from the past mistakes instead of making the same mistakes again and again. Because the life is short and our lead role to perform any task stays even shorter, so utilize what you have before time makes you appreciate what you had. 

Dreams That Don’t Let Go

A Past to my present is what I call a DREAM.

Sometimes you cannot let go your character just because of your dreams but sometimes exactly opposite of this happens that is you cannot let go your dream rather get your character conform to your dream. You just want to bring your character into correspondence with your dream.

In the first case, our character plays a stronger role or our dream is a bad dream, which we do not want to live. But the second case is when our dream becomes our inspiration and a reason to live. That is exactly when we are motivated, pushed and propelled towards doing something which makes our dream a reality. A beautiful, more meaningful and a reality which we always wanted to live.

This clearly means that dream is different from reality. Today I have earned a doctorate degree from one of the best universities of India, is the reality I am living with. But this achievement is, back then, driven by a force called DREAM. My parents wanted both of their children to have Dr. as a title to their name. Although we were never forced, but it just happened automatically, much before when we could have realized, that we (me and my younger sister) started living our parent’s dream. And then I realized that it is not only your own dreams which plays a role in building your future rather dreams of your loved ones also becomes a reason for your achievements.

Dreams have another very peculiar, an idiomatic and a unique character of their own which I like the most about them and that is when your reality doesn’t allow you to live what you want to or love to; and then dream becomes your saviours, the only rescuer.

My mom who lives in heaver now, cannot receive a letter nor a last phone call. She is a star shining bright in the sky that can only be looked at that too only during clear nights. Moreover, there is no highway, no ship; neither flight nor anything else is available which can take us there to meet her with a pre-condition to bring us back. But dreams can; rather only dreams can. My dreams being the most powerful, the saviour allows me to meet her occasionally. She really cooks well in my dreams too and those are the only mornings when I do not wake up starving. She still has the solutions to my problems in my dreams. And this is why I always say, I LOVE DREAMING.

Here I want to conclude that my dreams are what I really live for and although not very real, but still give me pleasure, satisfaction and affection of their own. I really want to dream on and on and on…………