Some coffee, birds and lessons

While sitting in a fantastic place with the blue sky above, sprinkling water over your head to keep you cool and the delicious food to keep you away from hunger I observed few things today. These are the things which we generally overlook but when we dive into the deep meaning of every small little detail of these, then we come to know that they usually teach us those lessons which otherwise we ignore.

“Hey, do you want to grab coffee soon?”

It’s a text that regularly lights up my phone; it’s one I’ve sent many times. When I moved to this present job, shortly after finishing my PhD, I knew none in this government land. And later got to know just few, rather just two who can be asked for coffee or Friday evenings’ celebrations, because my initial concerns were adjusting to my new job and not  knowing many as I have always been choosy on the people whom I love to conversant with. I will get to know people gradually, I thought.

There was new job, there was work, there was other stuff — and there was plenty of “grabbing coffee” with new acquaintances in the midst of it all. (Can we also briefly acknowledge how weird of a phrase “grabbing coffee” is?) Yet as the months and then years passed, I still felt like I only really knew those same two people or may be two more now. I’d just left a campus where I felt like I knew everyone, and this sense of loneliness — of missing something — became heavier and heavier.

What was I doing wrong?

Good news! I’m not alone in this eternal cycle of lattes and small talk now.

And thank goodness science is here to explain why: In the 2012 New York Times article “Friends of a Certain Age,” Alex Williams references the “three conditions that sociologists since the 1950s have considered crucial to making close friends: proximity; repeated, unplanned interactions; and a setting that encourages people to let their guard down and confide in each other.” This combination of factors, according to sociology professor Rebecca G. Adams, “is why so many people meet their lifelong friends in college.”

But now college is over, and Williams writes that “it’s time to resign yourself to situational friends: K.O.F.’s (kind of friends) — for now.”

“Kind of friends” are those people with whom you set up a meeting at Starbucks or any other (in a series of texts that include an appropriately cheerful amount of exclamation points). They’re the friends who ask about where you’re from and where you went to school, and they try to find anything you might have in common. The coffee may be hot, but the conversation is lukewarm at best. Time together usually ends with “we gotta do this again soon.”

I love coffee and I love a good conversation that’s accompanied by good coffee.

Coffee invigorates the senses, boosts concentration and serves as a great backdrop to a number of different scenarios. When meeting with a friend, someone who's more than a friend or a potential employer, a batch of coffee can go a long way. Keep a cup on hand while you discuss love, life and opportunities.

"Once the mug is empty, it's time to go."

Hence my take away to sum up is, it gives you exact time with exact taste to discuss the exactly the relevant things or may be to bring in the feeling of lighter you.

Also, while sitting with the coffee in hands and observing the birds flying in one particular direction, behind them I could only see the light orange sky which absolutely looked like a blue lady, wearing a light colour saree draping some magical light in her flap making it look orange. It was a sun set effect, the sign of an end to a super day but also the start of the hope for a better tomorrow.

I also feel that since the earliest times of men, birds have inspired our deepest imaginations. Fearless and free in the sky, birds make us wonder, what would it be like to fly?

While none of us can sprout wings, we can all simply observe and learn from these beautiful creatures on how to create a beautiful life. Here are life lessons I could sum up today:

1. Be confident.

Birds learn to trust themselves before they take off in the sky. So have faith in your abilities and know that you will find a warm current to soar in.
 

2. Let your colors shine.

Different birds have hundreds of different hues. Be bright and make sure you aren’t hiding what makes you one-of-a-kind.
 

3. Show up early and often.

The legendary early bird gets the worm for a reason. So find something worth showing up for, and then show up every day.
 

4. Go with the seasons.

Birds thrive despite changes in their environment. Be fluid and go with the flow, trusting your ability to always find a branch to land on.
 

5. Flock together.

Birds seek strength and sustenance from one another. Keep friends and family close by as you navigate the days.
 

6. Spread your wings.

Eventually, all birds must leave the safety of the nest and become what they are meant to be. Have no fear of falling, and start flapping.

7. Always come back to nest.

Wherever you go, whatever you do, but the home and the family is the ultimate place where you belong to and should come back to is the final lesson, none other than birds, can teach you better.

And my additional take away sums up like this: you can’t keep the birds of sadness from flying over your head, but you can keep them from nesting in your hair.