Husband - Wife Conversation: which are not always on cup of coffee

 

Wife (W):   You do not understand my problem!

Husband (H):   And what is your problem which I do not understand?

W:               You do not understand that we should not be keeping any relation with your XYZ relatives.  Mrs. XYZ abused me for no reason. And this is her routine job of being impolite and always be ready to take out the shortcomings in whatever I do.

H:               See we cannot leave everyone for just a reason that they do no good to us. Why do you bother so much?  What if you do not think much about her or for that matter about anyone who is just not important to us? Can’t you leave the things then and there only?

W:               See, this is the reason I always say that you do not understand me. Rather you care for your relatives more than me.

H:               It is not about being caring to someone. Rather I am explaining you these things because I feel that I have that right on you and I assume that only you can understand these things better. I have no right to explain anything to Mrs. And Mr. XYZ just because they are not important to me.

W:               No! I know you cannot explain things to anyone. You can only suggest me to leave negative things and negative thoughts behind. And you cannot do anything about the wrong people (your loving relatives) around.

                   You can leave things behind because it’s not you who face it, but it is only me who has to undergo everything and that too so regularly. You always ask me to run in the shoes which I am wearing, but my advice is that you should only try and walk in my shoes once. Then probably you will understand my state of mind.

H:               This is something you perceive and probably this only is not allowing you to live happily with all the resources and people you have. My only suggestion to you is have some peace of mind and allow me to have mine too?

And usually after this, Husband leads a normal routine and wife ends us having even a worse state of mind for rest of the time or till the time they have any next conversation.

Many (especially SHE group) would think that a male cannot understand a personal front because he is over-occupied with the professional things happening at his end. Whereas, a female has to live with a dual responsibility of being a Professional Home Maker, so she has to deal with people (positive or negative) more often or more number of times than the male. SO she cannot leave the thoughts and bad things besides and lead a normal life.

 

My View (What I have learnt from my life in recent past): I think it is both Husband and Wife who have to understand each other. If wife does not want to do something and on the other hand husband does not want to leave that something, then they should resort to a mid-way, instead of parting their own ways. May be wife can end up doing just a bit and husband should not be too much involved in that particular thing. A balanced way is the only solution and then only both “H” and “W” can pursue a happy relation.

A husband should not always adopt an explaining attitude towards his wife. He should also try to listen to her and understand her point of view. On the other hand, a wife should not always adopt a complaining attitude. Rather she should also try to adjust, to certain extent, with the things and people around.

 

No relation is without arguments, sorrows or bad moments, but the shorter their life is, the better it is for a healthy relation. And it is only “H” and “W” who can mutually decide the life of bad moments. And the mutual consent, compromising behaviour, the importance to the bond they share, shapes their decision. As the saying goes, Excess of everything is bad. So being over explaining (which generally “H” is) or being over complaining (the typical “W” attitude) is bad too. Hence the only solution is that “H” and “W” should learn how to keep promises they have made to one another, how to live up to the words they have said to each other, how not to neglect all-together the each-other’s point of view and the most important being how to compromise for the lively and a happy relation with one another. Just trust each other blindly, and then only you can realize that the path on which the other person is taking you leads to GOD.

 

LOVE SHOULD ALWAYS PREVAIL.